Week 5 Wrap-up

So, here we are...back from the bye week. A much needed rest for most of the Skins players, AND ME. Lord knows I needed a vacation after that guy-wrenching game against the Giants two weeks ago, which saw my Skins stay in the locker room after halftime, and saw me throw things at my television.

Is there anything better for a pick-me-up than playing the Detroit Loins? Let's see...bad loss...terrible taste in your mouth...feeling sick to your stomach...feeling like you might just slip into a 2-9 coma. Well, the symptoms you are describing are called "Bad Team Syndrome", and it's really hard to cure. BUT...we do have something to help you fight the symptoms. This long-standing drug has been around for many years and always makes you feel better...it's called "Playing the Detroit Loins at Home."

In all seriousness, the Lions haven't beaten us in my lifetime, as far as I can remember, and they certainly haven't done it at home. As I watched the 34-3 drubbing of the Lions, I actually had to suck it up and give props to my team. They showed up. Don't worry though, I'm not drinking the kool-aid yet, and I have plenty of stuff to complain about. But first, the good things:

- Our front 4 actually got pressure on the QB without a blitz for the first time this year. It was nice to see...and Andre Carter is playing like a man possessed. He's the only one on the D-line worth a cent, but he's playing his butt off.

- Jason Campbell put together, in my opinion, the best game of his career. He was on target with just about every pass, and moved around well in & out of the pocket. This kid is going to be good, and I'm glad we finally decided to give him the ball for good.

- Antwaan Randle El is playing like a beast!! We all knew he had skills, but finally we're getting him the ball and he's able to do some things once he gets it in his hands. I really hope that hamstring is a minor thing and we will see him out there next week against Green Bay

- CARLOS RODGERS DID SOMETHING!! DID YOU SEE IT?!?! HE DID SOMETHING!! Wow...how shocked was I to see Carlos Rodgers actually break on a ball, catch it, AND run! I'm sure that's only the second time I've seen him catch a ball. I mean, I still think the guy is the worst corner in the league, but at least he did something finally!

- Greg Williams called an amazing game. He did a great job putting everyone in position, calling the right plays, and keeping the Loins' WRs in check.

Bad Things:

- Carlos Rodgers DID SOMETHING?!?! Yeah...way to go Carlos. Way to do something when it doesn't matter at all and you're in a 3-deep prevent zone defense against a team you know has to throw the ball. You're a real good CB...on your way to the Pro Bowl. Nice headbutt on the ball in the 1st quarter. Don't look up and catch it...it's much cooler to run towards it with your head down and then get praised by the commentators for making a good play, when it was a total accident.(BUM!)

- Running game was good, but it really could be better. The patchwork offensive-line is making it real hard to run right, so teams are stacking against the left. If we play a good defense, we're going to have a hard time running the ball.

- And speaking of the running game, why is Clinton Portis the most overrated RB in the league. He's always trying to compare himself to LT, but he's only about 1/3rd of what LT is. What the hell was that fumble?!?!?!? Protect the ball you bum! And, I don't know what it is about Portis, but he cannot stay on his feet for anything. He had a run in the 3rd quarter that SHOULD have been house, but he got breathed on and tripped up. LT (and the other premier backs) would have broken that tackle and taken it to the barn. Clinton Portis is OVERRATED, and I'd like to see him traded in the off-season. Too bad they don't consult with me.

- Fox's commmentators have gotten 100x worse than previous years. I hate it when we get their D team for our games because they never have any idea what they are talking about. They were ragging on Shaun Suisum about missing an FG early in the game, but fail to mention that he's only missed 2 this year, both from over 48 yards. Sheesh...give the guy a break and know what the hell you're talking about.

- We're out of WRs. At some point, we had 32432 receivers, but now we have none. If Randle El and Moss can't go next week, our week 6 starters will be James Thrash and Keenan McCardell (or Reche Caldwell). Wow...we really need one of our guys to get healthy here.

- Ok James Thrash...I know you're excited about touching the ball since you haven't touched it in 4 years, but for God's sake, PROTECT THE DAMN BALL!! Thank goodness for Rock Cartwright, who, if they ever cut, I might boycott.

Ok...I'm out of bad stuff. Well, I have more, but they are pretty petty and I'd be stretching a lot. So, I guess that's it...Nice win, too bad it was against a bad team. Let's see how we fare against Green Bay next week.

Week 5 Cuts:
1. Brandon Lloyd (he's just going to stay up here until they cut him)
2. Carlos Rodgers (he's STILL the worst corner in the NFL)
3. Clinton Portis (for being overrated)

Week 5 Game Balls:
1. Derek Frost (quietly booting it like 48 yards a pop; can't pooch though)
2. Jason Campbell
3. Skins O-Line (for being banged up, they are doing a good job)
4. COOOOOOOOOOLEY! (because, what list is complete without him)